Finding Peace, Rest now...

BioWare owns these characters.

Thessia:

The mansion and its few guest bungalows sat under the cloudless azure sky high in the Athame Mountains.  Surrounded by fresh snow, crisp, biting air and the calm serenity craved by people who lived a hard life, fought every good fight, and now deserved peace, silence, and freedom.  

The inside of the mansion was decorated in an earthy, yet elegant theme.  A few pieces of art by the acclaimed artist Mira T'Soni-Shepard graced the walls along with pictures of all the girls and friends of the family, and the rest was homey, comfortable, and warm.  

Since the children were mostly grown and off on their own, the mansion usually sat near empty save for the owners and a small staff to care for the sprawling complex.  The only reasons the Shepards kept it was for when the kids visited on holidays, old friends stopped by, or for occasional diplomatic functions because Liara was the Thessian Ambassador to the Galactic Senate.

Now it was full. Family and friends from all across the galaxy dropped everything they were doing to make the trek here and attend.  

Commander Elena T'Soni-Shepard moved among the guests, formal and crisp in her dress blue uniform.  Regal and elegant, intelligent and driven, engaging and disciplined, she was the perfect distillation of her parent's genes.  Finishing college early, she enlisted into the Galactic Marines as a private instead of going the officer route.  She worked hard under the name T'Soni and made a name for herself early, eventually being appointed as an officer and sent to the coveted N7 program. Through it all, she made sure her father did not use her influence to pave the way for her.  It wasn't until she was promoted to commander that she amended her name to T'Soni-Shepard.  It created quite a stir in the upper ranks, but she had already established herself as a more than capable officer and her father could not have been more proud.

Though she hated it and felt as if her control teetered on the edge of madness, she played hostess tonight and ensured everyone was attended to.  She threw herself into the mundane duties of settling guests into their rooms and having the staff circulate with drinks and appetizers.  Making everyone comfortable.  She felt that if she had nothing to do, she would lose her mind.

Any other person, Asari or otherwise, would have been intimidated by the assembled guests.  Giants of political policy, generals of military might, heroes who saved the galaxy.  But Elena had grown up among them.  She and her sisters had known them all their lives, played with them, thrown food at them when she was young, learned from them and respected each for their dedication, accomplishments and love of their parents.

The mood was somber, yet an almost forced cheerfulness permeated the atmosphere.  The guests walked among each other sharing hugs, stories and memories.  They all lived through the very worst of times together.  Bound together by the charisma, leadership, benevolence, love and iron will of Sarah Shepard.

Elena drifted out to the back deck and found High Clan Chief Wrex, and High Shaman Bakara speaking to Ambassador Tali'Zorah and the newly appointed Primarch Vakarian.  The tension was palpable back there and every few minutes they would all glance up to the master bedroom windows and the sorrow already etched in their faces would deepen.

Under the new compact of the Krogan People, the High Chief was required to give up clan name just as Shaman gave up their birth names upon attaining office.  He represented all Krogan and it was a symbolic gesture to show favoritism to none.  In the years since the genophage cure, he and Bakara had concieved hundreds of children.  Nothing gave him more pleasure than watching his whelps grow.

Last year, Primarch Victus retired to spend the rest of his life with his grand-children.  The next in line was a Turian who never flinched from duty, a stalwart friend and implacable enemy, Garrus Vakarian.  Rumor had it that he hated the job in general and on principal.  He was the perfect Primarch.  

Tali'Zorah, who no longer required an enviro-suit, became Ambassador to the Galactic Senate.  A fair and strong leader with vision and compassion, her leadership and example facilitated the long, peacefull co-existence between the Quarians and Geth on Rannoch.

Garrus, Tali and Wrex had been with Shepard from the start, they were her oldest living friends.  Each considered her a sister to them and the reason their lives were so much better now.  From the cure of the genophage to the reclaiming of Rannock, Shepard had done the impossible for each and they loved her unreservedly.

When Elena joined them on the deck, she was near the end of her rope.  Tali and Bakara saw it immediately.  The slight quiver of the lower lip, the desperate, panicky look in her normally confident eyes.  "Is there anything I can get for anyone?"  She asked in a reedy voice.

"Yes, come with us."  Tali said as she and Bakara moved forward and lead the young Asari woman away from the men to a dark, secluded part of the deck.  Tali held the girl close, trying to lend her strength.  "Elena, you can cry.  You don't have to be the strong one."

"Yes, little daughter, you are among family."  Bakara said.  "Please, let us be your strength.  Let us help."

Elena glanced from one to the other several times and they could see her self control finally crumble.  She flung her arms around the two women and the tears came, torential and hot between sobs and gasps.  It was the kind of cry that cleansed the soul, let out the pain and maintained sanity.

The two women stayed with her for the rest of the night, lending that spiritual cruch a daughter needs when her life crumbles around her.

Kasumi Goto, now retired and wearing a stunning green dress instead of her old armor and hood that let her long black hair fall freely down across her shoulders, sat on a couch in the living room with Mira and Mara, the Shepards' twin daughters.  She and Mara tried desperately to engage a devastated Mira in conversation, but the girl just sat staring across the room in a daze, rocking to and fro, holding herself tightly.

Mira was always the most emotional of all the children.  Her honest feelings were always on her face for anyone to see.  She spent all her time creating gorgeous paintings and sculptures that were snapped up by private collectors and galleries in the very best cities around the galaxy.

Mara was one of the leading theorists in physics and Mass Effect technology.  Her new ideas could lead to individual ships containing mass effect jump drives which would antiquate the old relay system entirely.

As completely opposite as they were, the twins were always together.  They always lived no further apart than two or three blocks and spent most of their free time together.  Their link and interdependence was that strong.  Mira silently thanked the Goddess for her sister, she knew she could never survive the night without her.

Riell, the youngest of the four kept a close eye on Elena until Tali and Bakara took her away on the deck.  She always adored her eldest sister, nearly worshiped her and knew the pain she was keeping inside, the turmoil that she would never let show.  Though only eighteen, she was a senior at the University of Serrice already.  Now she was preparing to launch her quest for a doctorate in history and xeno-cultural history.

After sharing a little small talk with Miranda, Jacob and Dr. Cole, Riell climbed the stairs to the upper landing.  Across the way from the top of the stairs were a pair of double doors guarded closely by Matriarch Aethyta, Samara and Urdnot Grunt.

As Grunt paced back and forth across the landing, holding his shotgun lovingly, Liara leaned half-way out the door, whispering to the older Asari women.  An unusual look of compassion and love crossed Aethyta's face as she drew her daughter into a tight embrace.  As they parted, Riell saw both women crying and her young heart broke at the sight.

"Do not worry," Samara said gravely.  "I vow no more visitors shall pass tonight."

Liara gave her a look of gratitude and slipped back into the bedroom.

Riell felt the end draw near.  The oppressive sorrow settled within her.  It was heavy and suffocating within her breast.  She turned and sat on the top stair, and buried her face in her hands and cried while she waited for the end.  Soon the hulking mass of Grunt settled down next to her and he awkwardly draped a gentle arm around her slim shoulders.  He said nothing, just held her while she cried for her father.  Tears he could not show.

'''''

The master bedroom was awash in dusky, crimson sunlight cascading across all the flowers and gifts from worlds around the galaxy, including a small potted sapling from Tuchanka, the only plant legally authorized to be taken from that planet.  The small treelike plant is called a Shepard's Stem.  It represents hope to the Krogan people, and is protected under penalty of death of its home world.  

On the nightstand sat a small rock.  A rock from Rannock from Tali.  It was the same one Shepard gave to her the day she claimed land on her homeworld.  It meant the world to Tali just as Sarah did.

Liara noticed none of it.  She only had eyes for the woman lying in their bed, struggling for breath.  

Until a year ago, Sarah Shepard looked so much younger than her 97 years.  The nano-bots and implants kept her system working at the rate of a thirty year old.  She was strong, agile, energetic and never looked older than forty.  Then it all turned around so quickly, Liara still couldn't believe it.  In six months, her one true love aged fifty years before her eyes.  

It was Alzheimer's that did it.  The only part of her that was not 'improved' or under influence of implants was her mind, the very soul of Sarah Shepard.  As the disease set in, the nano-bots and implants tried to heal her, but it was not a condition they could heal.  But they still tried and they scrounged nutrients, blood, minerals and proteins from the rest of her, ravaging the once strong body of Sarah Shepard.  So while she was not dying of Alzheimer's, it served as the catalyst to her end.

Earlier, Sarah had been feverish and her mind was locked in the past.  Her voice filled with desperation as she re-lived searching the Dracon Trade Center for Liara.  Liara could only hold her and try to calm the woman as she frantically searched for the woman who was already holding her close.  Liara felt so inadequate, so humble to know the depth of Sarah's love for her on that terrible day.

Liara crossed the space from the door to the bed quickly, sat on the edge and gazed down at her love.  She bit her trembling lip while white-hot tears welled in her eyes from the depths of her heart as she reached out and caressed Sarah's feverish cheek.

Sarah's eyes fluttered open and searched frantically until they settled on Liara's soft, loving quicksilver pools of sapphire.  The grey eyes calmed and cleared, and Shepard smiled weakly at her bond-mate.  Liara was relieved that Sarah's mind was here with her now, not in some memory of the past.

"Why so sad, my Love?"  Sarah whispered.  Liara could feel the woman's concern for her.  Sarah knew nothing but compassion for her bond-mate, even though she faced the end of herself.

Liara forced a smile and quickly wiped away her tears.  "I am fine, Sarah.  I'm just worried about you."  She managed.

Shepard's lips twitched up in that maddeningly cavalier grin of hers and the old fire came back to her eyes again.  "I'll be up and wrestling Krogans in no time, Liara.  I just…I just need some rest is all."  She glanced around the room.  "Are the girls here?"  She asked in a voice tinged with love, hope and desperation.

Liara's heart broke just a little more and fresh tears coursed down her soft cheeks.  All the girls had been in to visit no more than an hour ago.  "Yes, dear.  I'll bring them in soon.  I promise."  

Shepard relaxed and smiled.  "That's good.  I miss them so much."  

"They miss you, too.  Mira and Mara can't wait to see you, but Elena and Riell have them helping with dinner right now."  She fibbed.

Shepard's eyes widened for a moment and she reached out to take Liara's hand.  "I'm…slipping, Liara." She managed to say and a look of regret and loss settled in her eyes.  "Please…don't go."

Liara slipped into the bed and lay back against the pillows with Sarah and settled her bond-mate's cheek to her breast.  She held the thin body close, stroked her white hair and hummed softly to her in the waning light.  She felt her heart break anew as she thought back on all times Sarah held her up, gave her strength, was always there for her.

"Liara?"  The voice was weak, raspy, soft yearning against her breast.

"Yes, my Love?"

"Tell me why you love me…"

Liara's breath caught in her throat, Sarah never asked that before, and she struggled to express how much and why her heart belonged to Sarah with paltry, inadequate words.  "I…I love you because you gave me four wonderful children, Sarah.  I love you because of your inner strength and humanity.  I love you for all you have done and how you did it.  I love you for helping people of every walk of life, defeating the Reapers, forming the Galactic Senate and the Combined Galactic Military and bringing peace to the galaxy."  She looked down at the frail, withered woman lying with her and saw only the amazingly driven and charismatic woman she met seventy years ago.

"I love you for the father you are to our girls.  I love you for the glass of water you put on my nightstand for me every night."  Liara stopped and tried to calm her breathing as powerful emotions surged within her, making her gasp for air.  Her chest filled with the overwhelming love she held dear for Sarah.  "I love you…I love you for the amazing bond-mate you have always been.  I love you because you kiss me every night and morning.  I love you because you ask for nothing, but give everything.  The love you give to me.  I have never not felt loved by you.  I love you for that and so many other things, my heart."

Shepard shook a little in her arms.  Liara could feel Sarah's tears on her breast.  Her voice was a rasping whisper in the gathering darkness, "I…I never deserved you…"  

Another sob escaped Liara as she kissed the top of Sarah's head.

"So…tired.  So…cold."

Liara pulled the blanket higher, cradled Sarah closer and wrapped herself around the now frail woman who had risked her life to protect her so many times.  Giving the young Asari the strength to face and do the impossible.  She prayed to the Goddess to look after this purest of souls.  "Shh, my love.  Let me warm you.  Rest."  She whispered through tears and heartbreak.

"Liara?"

"Yes, dear?"

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

She felt Sarah turn her face against her breast and kiss her lightly.  "So…tired.  So much…to do."

Liara gazed into the gathering night, knowing the greatest chapter of her life was closing, feeling her heart go with it.  She knew there could never be another for her.  She had been blessed to have known and loved Sarah.  

Liara already knew perfection of the heart.  

"Rest now, darling."  She breathed, and felt Sarah's labored breathing slow.  "You have done enough, my love.  Rest."  

"I'll…miss you."  The voice is so weak.  So scared.

"Goddess knows I'll miss you, my love."  She gasped between sobs.  "Rest, my love. We…will be together again.  I promise."  

She counted and cherished each breath as they lay together one last time and the stars started to shine in the clear night sky.

Slowly, horribly, she realized there will not be another breath.  She was alone now and the hungry shadows of mourning, grief and loss clutched at her soul as she lay with her one love and finally let out the heart-rending sorrow that consumed her.  

She sobbed and moaned as the pain in her heart threatened her sanity in the darkness for her bond-mate, for her loneliness, for their children as she desperately clung to Sarah's body in the dark, cold, lonely night.


Outside the door Samara and Aethyta heard Liara's heart wrenching sobs from within and shared a long, profound look of sorrow.  Samara raised her hand and rested her palm to the cold, hard wood.  "Find peace in the embrace of the Goddess, sister."